Today has been a bad pain day. If you’ve never experienced chronic pain, a bad pain day is hard to relate to, I suppose. Imagine falling down a flight of stairs and feeling sore for a few days from the fall then extend that feeling through every day of your life. Some days it feels like you just fell down the stairs. Other days it feels as though you’ve broken most bones in your body. And some days you feel sore but almost normal.
This morning the muscles in my hips and left leg are contracting into painful charlie horses which was a painful way to wake up. Even the muscles in my lower bad were tight and sore. I quietly hobbled downstairs to get some pain meds trying not to wake up Jonathan. Sometimes moving around helps so I tried doing some chores. It didn’t help.
Since it hurt to bend, it hurt to walk, it hurt to sit, it hurt to stand…basically every activity hurt, I decided to take a muscle relaxer. Jonathan woke up and it still took an hour for me to be ready to go thrifting because the cramps and pain were so serious. While we were shopping, I would have miserable shooting pains if I turned too suddenly or bent down to look at something. I would wince and try to breathe through the pain so the other shoppers didn’t think I was insane. Jonathan worried about me the whole shopping trip which drained the joy from looking at furnishings for our new house.
I needed to carry some small boxes upstairs and couldn’t because of the pain. I needed to clean, but couldn’t. I needed to pack boxes for the impending move but that was out of the question.