Luke’s 3rd Appointment

Luke’s third psychotherapy appointment is scheduled for this afternoon. Jonathan and I are to attend a parent-teacher conference before the therapy appointment. It’s a busy afternoon so I’m only working a half day. Really I don’t feel like working at all.

Luke’s behavior has improved. He’s acting happier. Jonathan has stopped calling him dramatic and loudly asking Luke what his problem is when Luke misbehaves. I think Jonathan’s starting to get it. Oliver is a huge source of dissatisfaction in Luke’s life. Oliver left a bowl in the sink. Oliver eats too much. Oliver poured juice but didn’t drink it. Oliver only ever sits in his room watching YouTube to the exclusion of all else. Luke finds fault in everything Oliver does. Every activity. Every assignment. Every family activity. Oliver simply eating breakfast at the table throws Luke into a tizzy. I don’t know how to stop this. Oliver is just acting like an ordinary kid. Luke’s illness is not Oliver’s fault but Luke blames him just the same.

I can’t keep taking off work like this. I already need to take time for my own health issues and, while I try to keep that to a minimum , that time adds up .

I feel like I should have the answers to so much but I have the answers to so little. I’m exhausted. I just need a break but there isn’t a moment in sight that isn’t used up by work or kids or Jonathan or chores.