Luke In Love…Among Other Things

To Eczema or Not To Eczema

Now that the itchy skin condition of doom is better controlled, I can continue talking about pretty much every other aspect of my life – like my inability to sleep like normal people, unraveling Luke the 12yr old’s depression, kids being kids, and work being work.

Before we start all of that, tonight I mixed raw shea butter with the DIY coconut oil lotion I’ve been using. It’s so nice! I’ve been out of the shower for 40min now and I’m not itching at all. The shea butter is very moisturizing and isn’t sticky. It also adds thickness to the coconut oil  which helps keep the coconut oil from dripping as I apply it.


 

One Hour of Napping; One Week of Recovering

Today was a moderate pain day. Considering I messed up my sleep schedule with a nap on Monday, I’m not surprised I feel awful today. Part of fibromyalgia means not sleeping well and part of RA is pain and fatigue. Combine the two and you get how I’ve felt all day. It feels a bit like coming down with the flu after a super strenuous workout. I can’t even afford a nap when I’m tired because one nap will throw off a whole week. Sigh…


 

Luke in Love…Among Other Things

(For the new readers: Luke is my husband Jonathan’s 12yr old son who suffers from depression, suicidal thoughts, and anxiety disorder among other things. He often confides me but asks me not to tell anyone which leaves me between a rock and a hard place.)

Last week, during Luke’s therapy session, I asked Luke about two things: why he talks about how stupid he (thinks) he is all the time and why he has stopped eating. Instead of handling the questions in any sort of mature or helpful way by trying to articulate his feelings, he chose to stare off into space and remain completely silent the entire session.

Really, Luke???

Luke has a girlfriend. We’ll call Luke’s girlfriend Cloe.

Today Luke told me his girlfriend Cloe is into self harm and one of Luke’s friends hates Luke’s therapist. Why does the friend hate Luke’s therapist? Because that kid went to a therapist he didn’t like…a therapist who is completely unrelated to Luke’s therapist. Gee thanks, jerk kid.

As someone with a history of eating disorder, I’m very knowledgable about the symptoms and habits of eating disordered people. Luke’s description of Cloe’s behavior – self harm, refusing to eat, etc – makes me wonder if Cloe is developing an ED. Perhaps she already has an ED. Anyway, Luke decided to stop eating lunch because Cloe doesn’t eat lunch. Argh! Show some independent thinking skills here, Luke! When asked, Luke’s explanation for refusing to eat is that he’s “not really a food person”. Never mind the fact that food is…oh…required to sustain life.

Luke has been obsessed with constantly talking to Cloe. He breaks the 2-hour-a-day internet rule to “secretly” IM Cloe from other computers in the house. “Secretly” is in quotations because, before Luke started sneaking IMs to his girlfriend, I installed monitoring software on the computers. I installed the monitoring software partly because I’m a computer geek who enjoys tinkering, but mostly so I could control the volume of streaming music without physically walking to the computer and using the keyboard to change the volume. Now the monitoring software is catching Luke breaking the rules. Do I just let it go or do I say something to Jonathan about Luke’s secretive rule breaking?

Parenting a preteen is a huge pain the arse sometimes.

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5 thoughts on “Luke In Love…Among Other Things

  1. Nice to hear you are doing a little better. I have slept so well the past few days that I had time for horrible dreams. lol

    Love is supposed to help, but teen hormones are at their optimum. I wish Luke well with wisdom. I an an old man and was declared as mildly anorexic. I read a book on self harm and it takes a very well trained therapist to deal with it—it is very complicated.

    I don’t think Luke needs someone like that in his life, but puppy love is hard to manage.

    1. Luke probably doesn’t need someone like that in his life, but I don’t feel banning his friends in the right choice either. He’s going to be around people that influence him for the rest of his life and he has to learn out to manage it.

      Maybe Cloe needs Luke in her life? She seems like she has some problems and needs someone to talk to.

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