Out of the Office
Tomorrow will be my first day back in the office after 11 days out of the office. I had scheduled 5 days off then got sick with a cold. Since I have asthma, a simple cold makes me extraordinarily ill for a week. So, I worked from home last Monday, took time off Tuesday because I stayed up all night coughing and wheezing Monday night, then took my regularly scheduled days off Wed, Thurs, and Friday.
I’ve enjoyed being out of the office. Even though I was quite sick, I got a few things done around the house – even if I didn’t get to paint the furniture as planned or attend the Friends-giving parties.
I spent time with Jonathan. We cuddled in bed and I got to appreciate his hot body. Yes, Jonathan is hot. Like, male model hot. I’m lucky. (Especially considering I’m not model-hot by any stretch of the imagination.)
Jonathan is also a kind hearted person. While I was sick he helped with so much and encouraged me to rest which is something no one has ever really encouraged me to do. Having a chronic disease usually means family pulls away, criticizes, and refuses to believe you’re really sick – at least, this was my experience with my family and ExHusband. Jonathan never criticizes and doesn’t think of me as lazy. He just loves me. He loves me in the way I can look into his eyes and see that he just loves me. It is wonderful to be loved like that.
I spent time with Luke and Oliver too. Luke (12) has been in a crappy, nasty mood for the past few days but I did have a few good moments with him. I generally chalk up Luke’s nasty mood to being off schedule and also being 12. Luke needs a schedule to control his anxiety and anger, I think. Oliver (9) and I went to Wendy’s and to the grocery store today and had the most fun together. Oliver got to choose a flavor of ice cream and what he wanted to pack in his lunch for the following week. Oliver and I also made plans for this birthday a few weeks from now. He’s inviting a friend to spend the night Friday after school then we’re having a party on Saturday.
An Atypical Thanksgiving
On Thursday I went to my grandmother’s house. Typically my dad and his twin sister make some remark about my life choices being unsavory and my body being too fat. I should be kinder to my (abusive) mother. I should get rid of my pets. My aunt always complains that I’m lazy because I don’t wash the dishes. In reality, I’m allergic to the dish detergent so my hands break out in hives followed by a blistery peeling rash so I have to wash dishes with gloves. My aunt tells my dad she thinks this is an excuse. My uncle, the one who’s married to the critical aunt, and I sit together and make snarky sarcastic remarks about my father’s and aunt’s remarks and about my mother’s behavior.
Fortunately none of the typical bullshit happened this year. My cousin (who weighs more than I do) got engaged so, sadly, they focused on her weight instead of mine. However, since my cousin’s mother and sisters are all close, they shut down the criticism quickly. I’m not entirely sure where my snarky uncle sat at the table but I was surrounded by Jonathan, Luke, and Oliver. My dad came to our table and talked to Jonathan about redoing the bathroom in the house I grew up in.
It was all strangely peaceful…normal. The way normal families, the ones who aren’t toxic, interact with one another.